The Truth About Lies

Why We Lie

We might not like the idea of being untruthful, but we justify lying for the following reasons:

• To shift blame and avoid punishment
• To save face
• To avoid conflict
• To get our own way
• To get out of doing something
• To be nice or avoid hurting someone's feelings
• To make ourselves look better -- for fear of rejection or in order to gain something
• Because it's easier than telling the truth
• Because we can get away with it

Types of Lies

Lying is so embedded in our social behavior that we have developed many different kinds of lies, including:

• Barefaced / bold-faced lies -- obvious lies
• Big lies -- major lies
• Bluffing -- pretending that you are going to do something or are capable of doing so when you are not
• Bulls*** -- misleading nonsense
• Contextual lies -- giving false impressions by only telling part of the truth
• Exaggeration -- stretching the truth
• Minimization -- shrinking the truth
• Fabrication -- representing something that is made up as the truth
• Fib - an insignificant or minor lie
• Half-truths -- lies that contains some element of truth
• Lying by omission -- deception by leaving out important facts
• Perjury -- lying under oath
• Polite lies -- lie told to meet standards of politeness, such as "I really enjoyed the party," or declining an invitation due to "scheduling difficulties."
• White lies - small lies mostly considered harmless or tactful

Men's Lies vs. Women's Lies

Although some studies suggest that men lie more than women, others find that men and women lie about the same amount, but for different reasons.

• Men's lies are often intended to make themselves look better to other people.
• Women's lies frequently strive to make others feel better or to avoid hurt feelings.
• Men commonly exaggerate their height and earnings.
• Women commonly minimize their weight and age.
• Men tend to feel less guilty about lying than women.

Pros and Cons of Lying

Pros:

• People who exaggerate their achievements may actually end up fulfilling higher goals for themselves.
• People who lie to themselves may be happier than those who don't.
• Frequent liars may be perceived as friendlier than those who are more prone to bluntly telling the truth.

Cons:

• Liars may feel guilty and fear getting caught.
• People who frequently tell significant lies may wind up being viewed as untrustworthy.
• Honesty is one of the characteristics we most value in others. We don't like being lied to and see it as a betrayal.
• Telling major lies may be bad for your health: it speeds up your heart rate, raises your body temperature, and makes you tense.

Worst Month For Lying

According to a poll, we are more prone to tell lies in January compared to other months of the year. These lies may be about:

• How celebrations were spent
• Broken New Year's resolutions
• Christmas gifts
• Alcohol intake
• Money spending
• Being too sick to go to work on cold winter mornings
• Excuses to avoid socializing in the cold weather

Famous Liars

There are little white lies, then there are giant whoppers. Here are some of the biggest lies of all time:

• Bill Clinton -- "I did not have sexual relations with that woman."
• Richard Nixon -- "I'm not a crook."
• George H W Bush -- "Read my lips: no new taxes."
• Bernie Madoff -- admitted that his Ponzi scheme was "all just one big lie" after conning investors out of approximately $50 billion
• Charles Ponzi -- the original Ponzi schemer who raised millions by scamming investors
• Janet Cooke -- won the Pulitzer prize for her report on an 8-year-old-heroin addict who didn't exist
• James Frey -- Oprah Winfrey was not pleased when this author's memoir, 'A Million Little Pieces,' was revealed to contain fictional events
• Milli Vanilli -- had to return their Grammy after a lip-synched performance and the discovery that they hadn't actually sung on their records
• Elmyr de Hory -- forger of master artists, including Picasso
• Victor Lustig -- con man who "sold" the Eiffel Tower for a suitcase of money
• Benedict Arnold -- traitor of the American Revolutionary War
• Anna Anderson -- claimed she was Princess Anastasia of the Russian royal Romanov family and that she had escaped execution in 1918
• Frank Abagnale -- fraudulent check casher who posed as a pediatrician, attorney, college professor, and even as an airline pilot
• Kenneth Lay - Enron chairman who convinced investors that the company earned billions more per year than it actually did
• Rosie Ruiz -- first woman to win the Boston marathon but who actually only ran the last half mile and had previously taken the subway during the New York marathon

Common Lies

Many lies are repeated countless times daily all around the world. How many of these popular lies have you told?

• "I'm fine, thanks."
• "I haven't had too much to drink."
• "No, your butt doesn't look big in that."
• "I had no signal on my phone."
• "You're looking great."
• "It's not you -- it's me."
• "My battery died."
• "The check is in the mail."
• "I'll call you."
• "This is delicious."
• "We're just good friends."
• "She's in a meeting."
• "I never got the message."
• "It was on sale."
• "I can quit anytime I want."
• "I'm not ready for a relationship."
• "I'm too sick to come in."
• "Sorry, I'm busy that night."

Movie-Watching Lies

According to a British poll, four out of five people lie about what movies they've seen in order to impress. The top movies people don't want to admit they haven't watched are:

• The Godfather
• Casablanca
• Taxi Driver
• 2001: A Space Odyssey
• Reservoir Dogs
• This Is Spinal Tap
• Apocalypse Now
• Goodfellas
• Blade Runner
• The Great Escape

Fundamentally, I believe it is a protective mechanism for the teller and/or recipient.